January 2024: Happiness
‘I can only be happy if…’ We can save ourselves a great deal of striving if we recognise where real happiness comes from.
Happiness
Is not the sum of thrills,
Nor the conquest of proxies.
Happiness is already within,
Waiting to respond.
Watching Out for ‘If’
Happiness matters. Happiness gives us energy - we become more creative and generative, kind and confident. Happiness makes us nicer to be with.
Deep down we want to be happy. Why chase wealth, status, fame, sex, stuff? We believe they will make us happy.
Beware the word ‘if’: ‘I can only be happy if …’ ‘I cannot be happy if …’
We are not free as long as we think we need something external in order to be happy. Then we crave and cling - the very things that cause suffering.
When simply breath brings peace to our heart then we are both free and happy.
take 5 …
At the top of a blank page write ‘I can only be happy if ....’
Make your list.
Notice items that depend on others, money, success. Do you really want to make your happiness conditional upon anything beyond your control?
To explore this further try tweaking the phrase e.g. ‘I cannot be happy until … ’, ‘I cannot be happy if …’ or, ‘I need … to be happy’.
… and an experiment!
Think of happiness as something that is already within you. There are bound to be aspects of life that do not bring you joy, nonetheless, how can you awaken your inner happiness?
Try going big on habits of appreciation. In meditation appreciate the body, go for mindful walks and actively appreciate nature. Appreciate people and things around you, moment by moment. It can help to write down three things you are grateful for each day.
Note: low mood can make it difficult to connect with inner happiness. If sensing life and beauty bring no happiness increase your commitment to wellbeing e.g. sign-up for courses (such as mindfulness) or get support.
quotes …
Happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends solely on what you think ~ Dale Carnegie
If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem ~ Richard Bach
It is difficult to find happiness within oneself, but it is impossible to find it anywhere else ~ Arthur Schopenhauer
If you want to be happy, be ~ Leo Tolstoy
ps
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Roddy