December 2023: I&Me
Identifying with ‘I’ rather than ‘me’ creates a radical shift in perspective that liberates us.
Me is many things -
Mostly conditioned by others,
And the chemistry of reaction,
And the consequence of chance.
But I am I,
I who watches the flow
Knows the river and sees the sky.
Detachment
It proves useful to separate ‘I’ and ‘me’.
Consider ‘me’ as a gallimaufry that includes body, habits, knowledge, hurts, relationships, CV, possessions, wealth, titles, moods, hopes, fears, ideas, regrets, beliefs, prejudices, conditioning.
And consider ‘I’ as our capacity for awareness - our ability to watch.
There is an approach to life that identifies completely with ‘me’. Happiness thus rests on ‘success’ in multiple aspects, upon constant aspirations and juggling. This cannot be fulfilling: not only is it unrealistic, but life is always changing, with every aspect unsettled by threats and desires. There can be no lasting peace.
‘I’, by contrast, cannot suffer because it does not desire nor cling. It has no position or wealth. It has no need to impress. It cannot be a success or failure. It is not altered by the events of life.
Identifying with ‘I’, consciousness becomes our essential self. ‘Success’ is noticing what unfolds.
By consciously making ‘I’ our point of perspective we gain that distance which means we see all our experiences and ‘possessions’ without being caught up in them, as if we were looking at someone else. It enables understanding. It helps us not to take things too seriously, or personally.
Thus we can change, let go, choose, grow. It is a shift that gives us liberation.
take 5 …
Meditation is ‘gym work’ for consciousness. And like all gym work it is not always easy, and it needs to be regular. Mindfulness brings consciousness into life.
Beginners: choose an anchor, for instance the breath. Spend 5 minutes noticing the breath – from the nostrils to the movement of the chest and stomach. Whenever a thought distracts you, notice it, let it pass, and return to observing the breath.
Advanced: shift your consciousness outside of the body. One way to do this is to imagine looking at yourself as you mediate; as if the ‘I’ was sitting in front of ‘me’, observing.
… and an experiment!
Identify ‘I’ with consciousness, the ability to observe. Put the ‘me’ into the third person, so you can more easily understand feelings, desires and experiences.
Be more careful about language. We tend to use pronouns interchangeably (me, I, myself etc). Try using the third person when you think about yourself. Instead of identifying by saying, for instance, ‘I am depressed’ or ‘I want a new job’, use your name e.g. ‘Roddy is… ‘ or ‘Roddy wants…’
quotes …
I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart. I am. I am. I am ~ Sylvia Plath
Only in the stillness of detachment can the soul yield up her secrets ~ Elsa Barker
The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
ps
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Roddy